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Bachelor in Paradise

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Bachelor in Paradise Finale Recap

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My thoughts on the end of Bachelor in Paradise…

This season felt so short, but I guess stopping production for several weeks to investigate a non-sexual assault incident will do that to a season!

It seemed a bit anti-climatic, if you ask me.

The best part of the show was talking to the cast after the show had been done for several weeks. Read More »

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10 Thoughts on Bachelor in Paradise Thus Far

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My thoughts on Bachelor in Paradise about halfway through the season…

We were hit with the devastating news that Nick Viall and Vanessa Grimaldi called it quits this week.

I know, I know…you were shocked. 

I actually was shocked, probably because I have an unhealthy obsession with Nick and I could have SWORN he was in it for the right reasons and really followed his heart this time.  Read More »

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For DeMario & Corinne, Paradise No More {Bachelor in Paradise}

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It was curtains for DeMario and Corinne (and their reputations) after alleged “sexual misconduct” that was later found unsubstantiated.

After watching the first two episodes of Bachelor in Paradise (an astounding FOUR HOURS worth of television over two nights), I can honestly say I have even less clarity about the Corinne/DeMario situation than I had before the show started.

And I’m annoyed. 

Media reports at the time intimated that some type of sexual misconduct had occurred and the blame was placed on DeMario.

“I am a victim,” said Corinne in a statement shortly after the news broke. Read More »

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Bachelor in Paradise Drinking Game

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Print your Bachelor in Paradise Drinking Game and join the fun!

It’s almost paradise!

Can’t ya just hear that cheesy theme song playing in your head? I know I can!

Make sure you’re ready to play along with the Bachelor in Paradise Drinking Game by printing out your copy below! Read More »

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Oh, the Irony {Bachelor in Paradise}

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The irony in the decision to cancel Bachelor in Paradise…

Let me just start by saying, THANKS FOR RUINING MY SUMMER, BACHELOR IN PARADISE!

Seriously. 

Bachelor in Paradise was the juiciest, soapiest, most delightful treat among all the summer TV shows. It was The Bachelor meets Big Brother meets Temptation IslandRead More »

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Who Will Last? {Bachelor in Paradise Finale Recap}

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Which couples made it out of Paradise intact? 

CARLY WADDELL, EVAN BASS

Well, Paradise is closed for the season. Hopefully the cleaning crew is going through it with some heavy duty disinfectant, if not just burning it down.

So of the four couples left during the last episode, who has the best chance of survival? Read More »

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5 Highlights from Bachelor in Paradise Finale Part 1

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The end is drawing near…which couples will make it in the real world?!

WELLS ADAMS, JAMI LETAIN
 

The true sign that summer is over is not Labor Day, but rather the ending of the summer shows like Bachelor in Paradise and Big Brother.

Big Brother is still going strong, but it’s sadly the last two episodes of Bachelor in Paradise this week.

Fall is a-coming.

Last night’s Part 1 of the finale didn’t disappoint; couples broke up, couples got stronger, and there was an amazing diss. Read More »

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5 Tips for Ashley I. {Bachelor in Paradise}

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I feel the need to dispense some love advice to Ashley I.

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We’ve all been there. Lovesick over a guy who wants nothing to do with us.

Only…we weren’t on national TV and living through it in front of millions of viewers. I feel for ya, Ashley.

(My husband dumped me four times before I finally convinced him we needed to get back together and get married. Not joking.)

But girlfriend needs to up her game and realize what Nick so kindly tried to tell her last night on Bachelor in Paradise. This Jared thing? Not gonna happen.

Not now, not ever.

5 Tips for Ashley I.

1. Ditch the friendship with Jared. Immediately. You cannot be friends with a guy when you are trying to get over him. It just does not work that way. Cease contact with Jared. I don’t care how much you think you’re best friends with him. He’s just trying to be nice when in fact he is hindering your steps to move on.

 

2. Lose the V-card. Maybe not with Daniel, but I hear Wells is coming into town and judging by the previews, you two may hit it off. He seems like an excellent candidate for your first time.

3. Make a list of all the bad things about Jared. I’ll start. He is boring. He has a wonky tooth. He finds Caila interesting. His hairstyle needs an update. His facial hair is weird. He seems like he would be an awful dancer. HE DOESN’T LIKE YOU.




4. Stop crying. This may be the hardest to do, but it will help you the most. You’ve wasted enough tears on little Mr. Haibon who is not even worth it. Adopt an “I don’t give a f*ck” attitude to everything in your life. Jared’s dating Caila now and they’re riding horses on the beach? I don’t give a f*ck. Two of your press-on nails fell off and your manicure is all messed up? I don’t give a f*ck. The only person left to take on a date is Daniel? I don’t give a f*ck. Maybe Canadians are good in bed.

5. Volunteer. Take your mind off your heartache by doing good for others. Stop doing all the Bachelor events and seeing the same people over and over. Step out of your comfort zone and help others. Go to a senior citizen center. Work with underprivileged children. Walk dogs at an animal shelter. If you’re pressed for time, here’s a really quick and easy way to make a difference. Post a selfie of you with a piece of fruit or a veggie with the hashtag #DrinkGoodDoGood. Naked Juice will donate ten pounds of produce to people living in food deserts.

Ashley I., even though you can be really annoying, you have grown on me since first meeting you on Chris’s season of The Bachelor.

In (sort of) the words of Gretchen Weiner, “Stop trying to make fetch Jared happen.”

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Images courtesy of ABC.

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5 Things About Bachelor in Paradise This Week

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Why does everyone have such piss-poor judgment on Bachelor in Paradise? Oh right. The alcohol.

SARAH HERRON, CHRISTIAN BISHOP
 

Alright I’m just going to say it– ain’t nobody gonna find “love” on Bachelor in Paradise.

Jade and Tanner’s engagement (on last season’s BiP) and subsequent marriage is the only success story thus far and really, they’ve only been married for like a year and they don’t have any kids yet. So of course it’s easy for them.

I think all the producers really want is an entertaining show with lots of alcohol-fueled drama. I can’t blame them, but I just want to be upfront and say that to all you hopeless romantics, I doubt any of these couples are going to stay together.

With that said, I can’t get enough of this show. I binged on both of this week’s episodes today and I was left desperately wanting more.

Here are 5 Things About Bachelor in Paradise This Week…

5. My conflicting feelings about Daniel. I hated Daniel on JoJo’s season of The Bachelorette. He was too full of himself for seemingly no reason. I don’t think he’s all that cute, except he has a bangin’ body. Also, he liked Chad, so that’s questionable behavior right there. BUT when he gave his rose to Sarah this week, my heart melted a little bit. Who among us doesn’t want Sarah to find love? Daniel could have easily given his rose to Leah, who basically promised him sexual favors if he kept her around….but he gave the rose to Sarah. And then the champagne mini-picnic he threw for her? Adorable. I am a little shocked that Sarah is even considering him, though. But I kinda like it!




4. Evan. Speaking of people I feel sorry for, let’s talk about Evan. He got dumped by Carly, contemplates leaving Paradise, and then decides to go for Amanda?! What in his brain is telling him that he has a chance in hell that Amanda will come up for air from sucking face with Josh and agree to even speak to Evan? It’s just not happening, bud.

JOSH MURRAY, AMANDA STANTON
 

3. Josh and Amanda. Amanda, hon, you claim to be looking for a good guy to be a father to your kids. This is the best you could do? You dropped Nick Viall for this douchebag with rage issues? As for the constant making out…do they stop to eat? Does Josh ever burp in Amanda’s mouth? Does he HAVE to make those moaning noises when he’s in the presence of others? If Amanda shows such poor judgment to pick Josh and say that she “trusts him” literally 15 minutes after meeting him, then Nick dodged a bullet here. Good luck with this relationship, Amanda. You’ll need it! (Just ask Andi.)

2. Who is Brandon? Ummm. Who are you? Who? Desiree’s season? I barely remember Desiree, because she was so un-memorable. So I definitely don’t remember this guy. Unfortunately for Carly, though, Brandon does remember the twins. And Brandon likey. If only he could tell the difference between the two.

HALEY FERGUSON, BRANDON ANDREEN
 

1. I heart the twins. In related news, I now love the twins. Sure they are a little intelectually-challenged, but they are fun and funny. Please don’t leave, twins. If you do have to leave, though, please take the following people with you and leave them on the side of the road: Josh and Amanda. Oh and Evan. Maybe a lonely señorita will pick him up…

Images courtesy of ABC.

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10 Highlights from the Bachelor in Paradise Premiere

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Bachelor in Paradise is BACK and wasting no time with the action!

That. Was. AWESOME!

There is no shame in my game when I say that this is my favorite show of the summer.

It is trashy TV at its best.

It is a reward for sitting through countless hours of The Bachelorette all the while knowing JoJo was going to pick Jordan.

It is Nick Viall back on my television screen again. Hallelujah!

Without further adieu, here are 10 Highlights from the Bachelor in Paradise premiere last night…

10 Highlights from the Bachelor in Paradise Premiere

1. Daniel dumping syrup on himself in the opening credits. I mean…

2. WHY OH WHY CAN’T CARLY GET A GOOD DYE JOB??? This is her third time on a Bachelor-ish show, she seriously needs to up her hair game. It is too brassy. I’m hoping it’s just the lighting making it appear that way? No?

3. Two people said Evan is better looking in real life– Jubilee and Amanda. IS THIS TRUE?!

NICK VIALL
4. Who is Izzy?! She reminds me of that other one from last summer…Samantha. The crazy-ish one.

5. The cheesy effects– the music, the parrots, Jorge. I. Love. All of it.




6. “I’m excited. Gonna be me, Daniel, roses, alcohol, girls. We’ll be good.” –The Chad

7. The freaky clown with his creeper style and his sexual gestures. Worst date ever. Sidenote: Why do all the girls throw themselves at Jared?

8. Is every night going to be as lively as Nick eating nachos with the twins and Amanda while everyone else sits quietly on tiny chairs and stares at Chad and Lace?

9. “You’re being so un-murdery.” –The Chad

10. Do people still say “I’ll take you down to Chinatown?” According to Daniel they do.

We survived the initial hit of Hurricane Chad, but next week doesn’t look so lucky.

On a related note, could the producers seriously stop showing that shot of Evan getting a needle in his arm? I want to throw up every time I see that.

Tune in next week to see the aftermath of The Chad and find out who goes home in the first Rose Ceremony.

Bachelor in Paradise airs Monday and Tuesday nights on ABC.

Images courtesy of ABC.

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5 Things I’m Excited for on Bachelor in Paradise

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Screw The Bachelorette…Bachelor in Paradise is the REAL hot summer show!

CHAD JOHNSON, ISABEL GOODKIND, EMILY FERGUSON, JUBILEE SHARPE, JARED HAIBON, AMANDA STANTON, EVAN BASS, LACE MORRIS, SARAH HERRON, GRANT KEMP, CARLY WADDELL, DANIEL MAGUIRE, HALEY FERGUSON, NICK VIALL, VINCENT VENTIERA
 

Screw the Men Tell All! The best part about last night was the extended preview of Bachelor in Paradise that we were treated to.

Seriously, I could have turned my television off after that. That’s all we wanted to see. Well that, and Chase. #ChaseforBachelor

Also, I can’t believe that it starts in less than a week! To get us all ready, let’s discuss 5 Things I’m Excited For on Bachelor in Paradise… Read More »

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Bachelor in Paradise Finale Recap

bachelor in paradise

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Well that was certainly a wild ride in Paradise this summer! I have to say, Bachelor in Paradise is emerging as my favorite summer show (tied with Big Brother). 

And unlike last summer’s Marcus and Lacey, none of this summer’s couples made me want to vomit! Cheers to that!

Here are the Top 10 Highlights from the Bachelor in Paradise finale (plus the scoop from After Paradise)…

10. “You ruined this for everyone.” –Jade to Kirk after he dumped Carly. That’s a little extreme. He ruined it for Carly, certainly, but that’s about it. He was lucky to get out…who wants to date someone who is always spontaneously breaking into song?  Read More »

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He’s Just Not That Into You: Bachelor in Paradise Recap

bachelor in paradise

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Before we get into the highlights from the first part of the Bachelor in Paradise finale, let us pause to remember that at the end of Paradise, you don’t win money. You don’t win fame. All you win is love.

And by love I mean a relationship based on lust, beer goggles, and the unrealistic high of living life on a tropical island for six weeks. Just wait til Tenley goes to visit Joshua and sees that he has a messy apartment and probably doesn’t clean his toilet. 

It’s just not reality. But I digress. It’s still fun television entertainment and I, for one, am sad that it will be ending tonight.

Here are the Top 10 Highlights from Bachelor in Paradise last night… Read More »

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Dear Jared: Bachelor in Paradise Recap

dear jared

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Hide yer liquor, hide yer sex partners…Chris Bukowski is arriving in Paradise tonight!

Let the record show that this is the fifth TV show that Chris has appeared on in recent years. We have two seasons of The Bachelorette (well, one and almost a second) plus Bachelor Pad and last year’s Bachelor in Paradise.

In unrelated news, I miss J.J. Do you?

Here are the Top 10 Highlights (a.k.a. lowlights) of Bachelor in Paradise last night… Read More »

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Hi, I’m Joe: Bachelor in Paradise Recap

bachelor in paradise

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I’d like to start this recap out with a special shout-out to my in-laws who had to suffer through watching Bachelor in Paradise since I am staying at their beach house for the next three weeks.

It was highly embarrassing and I had to preface the show with such descriptive adjectives as “cheesy” and “silly.”

But I didn’t mean it, Bachelor in Paradise! You may be cheesy and silly, but I love you. This summer has been amazing. 

Without further adieu, here are the 10 “highlights” (or just things that bothered me) from last night’s Bachelor in ParadiseRead More »

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Love Ya Like a Sister: Bachelor in Paradise Recap

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Will Samantha and Joe’s evil plot to take over Paradise succeed? Or will Samantha come out from under the spell of the Southern psychopath? 

Will Ashley’s sanity fail her as Dan continues to date Amber? Or will the parrots help her keep her cool?

Will Jade and Tanner continue their reign as the most boring couple on the beach?

Get all the highlights from last night’s Bachelor in Paradise right here! Read More »

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Eeny Meeny Miney Joe: Bachelor in Paradise Recap

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Lots of shakeups on last night’s Bachelor in Paradise, including one that I totally didn’t see coming.

Here are the Top 10 Highlights from Bachelor in Paradise…

10. “The only guy who followed her was Chris Harrison and that’s probably because he’s paid to do it.” –Ashley I., about Clare walking out of the Rose Ceremony. Speaking of Chris Harrison, did he really tell Clare she’s only been here a week? I could’ve sworn it’s been like three weeks. I guess time stands still in Paradise. Read More »