The Sobriety Diaries {Day 17}

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My husband is not happy with me.

My husband is not happy with The Sobriety Diaries.

First of all, let me say that during the four years I’ve been blogging, he has made a comment about my blog less than five times. 

And it’s never a good comment. It’s always something negative.

So we don’t really ever discuss it. In fact, I didn’t even realize he was reading it.

But I guess he is, because Friday morning I got an email (our preferred method of communication about touchy subjects) that he thought I was sharing too much about my life and drinking. 

He specifically didn’t like that I wrote “My children drive me to drink.”

According to him, they will read that statement one day when they are older and it will cause them psychological damage.

I disagree with his assessment of this. 

I think that my statement was part joking, but also, it’s honesty.

Motherhood is tiring, it’s frustrating, and on many days, it’s a thankless job. 

And by 5:00, after being stuck home all day with kids, you can bet your bottom dollar that I’m ready for a glass of wine. 

I don’t really see how saying that is a bad thing. If my kids did take issue with it, I would tell them, “Just wait. Just wait until you have kids and then we can talk.”

I don’t even think my husband understands it. He doesn’t spend day after day after day being the primary caretaker for three kids. 

He gets to walk in the door in the evening and have three kids happy and excited to see him. 

His parenting gas tank is full, because he’s been away from them all day. At that hour, my parenting gas tank is running on empty.

So yeah, it’s the stress of being with my kids all day that is one (of several) factor that makes me reach for a glass of wine. So sue me.

I started this blog with the intention of being honest about motherhood. 

When I had Lilly in 2011, I was stunned at how different being a mom was from what I had pictured.

It was kind of hell-ish in the beginning, if I’m being honest. (It is still hell-ish sometimes, in fact.)

I wanted to share my non-perfect experiences with others so that we could commiserate together, and I wanted to know that I wasn’t alone.

I love my kids, but I am not going to pretend that it’s amazing being home with them all day, everyday. Because it’s not.

I know that other moms “get it,” but I guess it’s hard for my husband to understand.

Or maybe it’s just hard for him to hear, and I’m sure he’s sick of me complaining about the kids.

But I’m doing my best and that’s all I can do right now. 

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  • Jane
    September 10, 2017 at 11:56 AM

    I don’t think men ever Fully get what being a mom is. They seem to be able to turn on and off and if they are tired at night they just go to bed, whereas moms are tired but know that stuff needs to get done!

    • Lindsay
      September 13, 2017 at 10:36 AM

      So true…

  • Lisa
    September 12, 2017 at 1:29 PM

    There was a time when my husband would come home from work, yes, his parenting tank full. Then one of the kids would do something, and I’d ignore it or let it go. Then he’d say, “You need to tell him ‘no’ when he does that.”

    Thanks Captain Obvious. I already said NO 9000x fucking times today. I’m all out of NOs.

    It made me stabby. Thankfully the boys are older now and not in that toddler/preschooler phase when you’re saying NO thousands of times daily.

    • Lindsay
      September 13, 2017 at 10:37 AM

      LOL. Been there, Lisa!