Some people love the newborn stage. I am not one of those people.
Sure, they are cute and tiny and they tend to sleep a lot.
But personally, I’d rather just fast forward to around three months when things have settled down a bit.
I’m only 21 weeks pregnant and already having the typical new mom fears about the hospital stay and the ensuing newborn weeks.
My nervousness starts with anticipation of giving birth.
Not like the physical act of giving birth– that I’m cool with, thanks to epidurals. I literally felt nothing from the waist down for the previous two births. Just how modern medicine intended.
What I freak out about is the other things associated with the hospital stay. The IV (gag me). When they take the baby away from you for hours to do testing and checkups. The circumcision! Oh God, the circumcision. When I found out I was having another boy, that was the first thing I thought of. I hated being there in my hospital bed, knowing where they were carting my little guy off to.
I always beg the doctors to let me out of the hospital early. One night instead of two, please!
Then I get home and it sinks in that I’m never going to sleep again. Being awake by yourself to feed a newborn in the middle of the night (several times) is so isolating and scary.
Maybe you will have help from a family member for few days or a week, but then that first day your husband goes back to work, you trip over a blanket while holding your one-week-old and you both fall down. (Or was that just me?) Thankfully, it’s just a little bump and you are both okay.
But it just reaffirms to you how scary those first few weeks can be. And you know what? I was shocked, because no one told me that the first month can be hellish.
All I heard was that it’s so great and you fall in love with your baby at first sight and motherhood is amazing and breastfeeding is wonderful and butterflies and fairy dust fly out of the baby’s butts when they poop.
No one told me that it’s frustrating and emotional and exhausting (well, okay maybe I did hear that one) and that sometimes breastfeeding isn’t so wonderful.
Still, you power through that stage and only a year or two later find yourself looking at two naughty little kids tossing items out of your Target shopping cart and thinking how much easier it was when they were newborns…