You’re getting a combined post for Days 12 and 13 of The Melissa Gorga Experiment because it was a busy, busy weekend and I am still recovering. And since Melissa says family comes first, I decided to watch The Walking Dead with my husband last night instead of blogging.
Without further delay, here are Days 12 and 13…
Saturday morning was kind of hectic, because we were preparing to leave for Rhode Island for my dear friend Megan’s wedding. There was much preparation to be done. (Adding to the stress of the morning was the fact that my baby had been up literally every hour or two the night before. Thanks for that, munchkin.)
Anyway, it is almost inevitable that my husband and I get into a fight right before a road trip. It just always seems to happen.
I desperately tried to avoid that. While I packed up and made sure the kids would be set with their babysitters, my husband made pancakes a la Joe Gorga.
My insistence on remaining calm even while I was stressed paid off. We set out in the car only a half hour behind schedule. I breathed a sigh of relief and settled back into the passenger seat. To Rhode Island!
“Wait!” I cried, a mile down the road. “I forgot my breast pump!” My husband calmly turned the car around and we picked up this precious piece of cargo that I had forgotten.
The trip itself was uneventful. Just long. I made sure to belt out tunes along with the radio, because I know that’s what Melissa Gorga would do.
We arrived at our hotel with two hours to spare before the wedding. Time to get all dolled up!
I did spend some time lounging around topless as I got ready. I wish I could say I was trying to be sexy, but I was just pumping.
Melissa writes that a special night means a new outfit, so I wore my new blue dress from South Moon Under. Melissa also advises to wear jewelry that your husband bought you, even if it’s “not your exact taste.” So I wore the tiny diamond studs my husband got me also.
More of Melissa’s advice for a Saturday night out is to “flirt, be on our best behavior, and really enjoy each other.” I started off being flirty and on my best behavior. I repeatedly touched my husband’s arm and told him how handsome he looked.
And then the various glasses of wine and champagne kicked in, morphing me into more of a drunk Ramona Singer/Taylor Armstrong kind of a Housewife instead of a classy Melissa Gorga Housewife.
Photo courtesy of Elizabeth Berberich.
Despite getting a little too drunk, we had a really fun night. The wedding ceremony and reception were amazing, and the bride was stunning.
In my defense, Melissa Gorga also had a night like this on the show- remember at Lake George when she drank vodka all day and then was whispering sweet nothings to Rosie at the table? It was kind of like that.
We headed home Sunday morning with another long car ride ahead. Still no fighting even though we got lost a few times and I was unable to properly navigate us back to our route.
“Who doesn’t know how to read a map?” my husband kept saying. ME.
We made it home in the late afternoon. I entertained the kids for a few hours and let my husband (who had driven 12 hours there and back) relax and enjoy the Eagles game.
Being nice, agreeable, and appreciative is now becoming second nature. Are there still things I need to work on? Of course. Things like “being a lady in the parlor.” Holding my liquor. Important things like that. Oh, and ironing, as my husband so kindly pointed out while he was getting ready for the wedding.
“What is that hissing noise?” I said as I returned from the bathroom.
“I realize this device may be foreign to you, but it removes wrinkles from shirts,” said my husband. Zing!
To my wonderful friend Megan and her new husband Dan, mazel on your wedding and may you have many years of happiness ahead! And for Dan- GO BRONCOS.
Keep reading The Melissa Gorga Experiment: Day 14…