7 Burning Questions I Have After Reading “Turning the Tables” by Teresa Giudice

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Teresa Giudice dished the dirt about Danbury in her new book, but she left me with several burning questions…

Turning the Tables

It was a bit surreal to read Turning the Tables: From Housewife to Inmate and Back Again, the story of Teresa Giudice’s time at Danbury Federal Correctional Institution. And I’ll tell you why.

I am an avid fan of the Netflix show Orange is the New Black, which is based on a book written by former inmate Piper Kerman.

So it was odd to hear Teresa describe things that I already knew about Danbury from OITNB…which also made me realize that Piper’s description on the show was accurate (at least to an extent).

Before I get to the seven burning questions I have after reading Turning the TablesI will warn anyone who is thinking of buying the book that the first 100 pages detail Teresa’s life before prison– her childhood, teen years, marriage, becoming a Real Housewife, etc. 

I expected the book to just dive right in to the juicy prison parts, so that was a bit of a letdown. Not to say that her stories about growing up weren’t that interesting, but…that’s not why I bought the book. (There are only 250-ish pages in the book, by the way. I was able to read it very quickly.)

And now, here are the seven burning questions I have after reading Turning the Tables

  • Has Teresa seen Orange is the New Black or not? In the book’s first pages she wrote that “ironically, I still have not seen Orange is the New Black.” She reiterates this point during her interview with Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens Live– claiming that she has never watched the show. But later in her book, she references one of the characters from OITNB. She writes that one of her friends in prison was “kind of like my real-life Morello.” So which is it? I’m guessing she really has not seen the show and her co-author inserted that bit into the book, but it just makes it feel less authentic to me.
  • Were the prison women all synced up with their periods? A caller on WWHL asked Teresa whether all the women got their periods at the same time. Teresa answered that she had no idea. Then in the book, she writes “I was living with more than two hundred women, who were usually PMSing at the same time.” Again, it’s a small discrepancy between what she wrote and what she said on TV, but it makes me wonder how much of this she actually wrote.
  • Does she love the tabloids or hate them? You can’t have it both ways. Teresa complains throughout much of the book about the paparazzi trying to get pictures of her all the time. Yet I seem to remember Teresa and Joe holding a vow renewal ceremony and selling the photos to In Touch. Or it’s very possible that In Touch even paid for the ceremony. If you want to be a reality TV star, don’t complain about paparazzi. If they weren’t around, then your fame wouldn’t be either.

  • WHY DOES SHE WRITE IN ALL CAPS IN HER JOURNAL? Throughout the book, there are snapshots of the personal journal Teresa kept while in prison. She writes in all caps. Doesn’t that take so much more time? Also of note: she shares her notes for her vision board. Among her goals are things like a private jet, $40 million, sports cars, and vacations. Way to show you have “changed.”
  • Isn’t she afraid of writing about all these women for her own financial gain? Personally, I would be scared they would come after me once they got out of prison. Or at least blackmail me or ask for money for being mentioned in the book. 
  • Did she really pay off the $400K she owed for restitution? According to her lawyer, she did. No word on whether or not that is accurate. And according to this article, the Giudices still owe over $500K in unpaid taxes and thousands more to creditors.
  • How in the world is it possible that Teresa still shows no remorse for the actions that landed her in prison?! Correct me if I’m wrong, but the reason she went to jail was because she did shady financial dealings and then spent the money on cars, furs, and houses. Right? I kept waiting and waiting for her to admit that she regrets these actions, but over and over again she wrote how she didn’t understand why she was in jail. How the only thing she did wrong was sign a paper without reading it. She expressed sympathy for other women in prison for financial reasons, which just tells me that she is still trying to play the “woe is me, I didn’t do anything wrong” card. She even tells her mother (who asked why she was going to jail) “They thought I broke the law.” Thought?! You did break the law.

So there you have it. I was definitely entertained by the book, but I came away feeling that I still don’t trust Teresa.

All I want is for her to admit she was wrong for living such a lavish lifestyle and not being able to afford it. Why is that so hard?

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  • Carolyn
    February 12, 2016 at 11:11 AM

    She fascinates me. That whole NJ group does…they totally think they need to live these gigantic lifestyles but don’t have the money to do so. Unlike the NY and Beverly Hills crew where I believe the money is actually real. It is amazing. Thanks for the recap!

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